Category Archives: Spirituality

sick

Health & Wellness, Spirituality

I’ve been feeling sick for the past week or so. This time I really felt that I’m physically weak and my body is in a fighting mode. I rarely got this sick, and Hunny thinks that it’s because I’m in a detox phrase and my body is weak. Somehow I’m glad that I got sick, I felt like the virus is hiding in me for the longest time. It came out and I can finally fight back. I’m getting as much as sleep as I should. I sleep whenever I want. Though, I don’t want to take too much medicine, it actually helped my body to fight in this time.

Spiritually, I feel that I’m fighting something in the spiritual realm. I really don’t know what that is, if that related to family, personal, friends or anything…. i have no clue, but it’s a battle and I know God is for me, for us! I pray that I stay alert, keep on praying when God’s willing. I may be able to understand one day. Blessings~ He who trusted in the Lord shall not be disappointed. For God is with us, not against us. He takes care of us, and guide us in the path of the land of abundant. He who trusted in the Lord, is not poor in spirit. He who fixed his eyes on the Lord, shall hear the Spirit’s voice. Amen. God is with us. He leads us to understanding, He mould us into His image. We are who we are because God’s image in us. If we have a heart of God, we will see the needs around us. If we have the eyes of the Lord, we will see those who need the Lord, the gospel. Amen. The Lord gives us wisdom, knowledge and understanding. Though, we may seem to suffer, the Lord has carried the load for us on the Cross. Through sufferings, we may see the Lord’s heart, His heart for people. Praise the Lord. He redeems us. Praise the Lord. He delivers us. Praise the Lord, He saves us. Amen.

horrible

Sore spots, Spirituality

Some horrible things happen in my dream, it was evil and something I don’t want to mention… I feel frustrated to have bad dreams. I feel like something happening in the spiritual realm I can’t explain and it is disturbing me in my sleep…. I feel alone in this spiritual journey…. somehow I feel alone…. and lack of strength to fight back….

dream….

Life stuffs, Spirituality

So I have dreams again lately, and last night was about Mr. C & Miss W. I saw that I was in Hunny’s car and they were beside me. They were riding on a motorcycle and Miss W came by my window to say hi. The red light was gone and green light came on, so we were about moving. Indeed we were moving but Miss W didn’t let go off our car window. Meanwhile I saw Mr. C was getting anxious to go and kept asking Miss W to go back. He was about getting roll as we were also slowly going…. all the sudden Mr. C fell off his bike; however, Miss W was only watching and didn’t go over to help him up. I was puzzled in my dream as of why didn’t Miss W show any care when her husband fell on the ground… I should discuss with Hunny later.

dreams – Bible stories

Life stuffs, Spirituality

I dreamt of talking to an elderly women who seems to be a missionary and other pastor around in the same room. We had a conversation on how much I know the Bible stories. I told her I remember 登山變像 and Peter’s fisherman of men… there’s supposedly one more story, but I forgot when I got up…

Very interesting … maybe time to read the Bible again?

dream this week

Life stuffs, Spirituality

In my dream, hubby and I were on our way out of the airport. The highway was close due to construction and we had to go to the only route on the side of the city. We passed by a forest and then reached a wooden bridge. I was surprised to see the beautiful scenery behind those trees. There was this giant waterfall, very much like Niagara Fall in the East. The water was so clear underneath where the sun was shinning down and the water was glistening. In order to pass this scene, we had to cross the one and only way on this wooden bridge. It was scary since the wooden bridge was merely as wide as our car. However, we made it to the end, that’s also the end of this dream.

I told Hubby about my dream this morning… as we were discussing, I got a sense that we passed the trial, test, or whatever difficulty that we were facing. Surely, the path was difficult and dangerous, but the process itself is a beauty. I wonder what God is saying to us today!? Blessings~ God is with us!

another dream this week

Sore spots, Spirituality

I saw Ms.L in my dream, giving me a veggie stem to cut in pieces. However, this stem seems to be not fresh as I mention to her, se doesn’t seem to be care. Then I notice the nice piece of meat on the side, but that’s not her food. Then, I notice that some people are having conflict on the other side of the room, Tammy is there. When I walk over to Tammy, she turns and looks at me but walk away. I thought she must have forgotten me. Yet at the same time, I felt like she an angel around us, being the peace maker to make sure everything goes okay. She later on came back in the room, and tell me that of course she remembers me.

dreams

Sore spots, Spirituality

I had a dream of two happy puppies running around and do their own thing. They seem to be so happy and so free. Running around, these puppies couldn’t care less of what others think. Then Ms. P asks me to take care of the bunnies for her. I was shocked when I got closer to the cage. All the bunnies in the cage had their own compartment. They are lifeless, they are dead and dried like a mummy. The only bunny I notice that wasn’t dead yet, it is lifeless, and has hard time breathing. In the dream I had a feeling that it’s going to die soon.

Whatever the dream means…. I think hubby and I got some ideas on it.

Thank you Lord

Spirituality

Thank you Lord for this place to live. Thank you Lord for food on the table. Thank you Lord for our parents who love us. Thank you Lord for your provision. Thank you Lord you’ve heard our prayers. Thank you Lord you know our needs and wants. Thank you Lord you won’t spoil us. Thank you Lord for your discipline. Thank you Lord you give us opportunity to learn to have patience. Thank you Lord our lives are in your hands. Thank you Lord for your patience with us. Thank you Lord our hope is in you. Thank you Lord you grab us to hang on. Thank you Lord for the strength you give us. Thank you Lord this is not our home. Thank you Lord your presence is us with. Thank you Lord our home is in you. Thank you Lord we are able to praise you. Thank you Lord you put faith in our heart. Thank you Lord you increase the desire in our heart to love you. Thank you Lord your grace allow us to pursue you. Thank you Lord we have the joy of your salvation. Thank you Lord you never let us go. Thank you Lord you walk with us in different seasons in our lives. Thank you Lord we see you in our lives.

May you show us your way, your heart desire, your plan~ Thank you Lord~

To be home again

Psych stuffs, Spirituality

I dreamed of screaming and crying like an infant that only wants acceptance and love. The feeling of relief and freedom of crying out loud in this dream is something that I want for in the reality. If only I am brave enough to allow myself crying without worrying what other think of me. How sad… how oppress… of these feelings trapped inside of me.

Why do I often feel rejected? Why do I often feel like I don’t belong here (anywhere)? The fear of being rejected kept me away from people. I found myself intentionally walking away from friends because I want to see if I’m worthy for anyone to pursue for friendship. Yet, I know that I want to be pursued but I don’t want to commit in a friendship.

Early in my teenage years to my early twenty’s, people came and gone in my life. The heart breaking of people leaving due to various reasons. I once thought I found my group of friend… maybe they never meant to stay….

I can only say that I know this loneliness is not to be filled by human. I recognize the earth is not my home, being with God is home.

I just want to be home again.

Yes/No

Life stuffs, Spirituality

Every time when Peter saw me early in church, he would always tell me that he didn’t know what he was doing. Today, he said the same thing, and jokingly asked me to speak today. “Me? You want me to speak?”, I replied in a worried voice tone. He said, “yah, as long as you have God’s word, you do have God’s word right?”

Of course, I know he was joking… yet again, it got me to think if I really have anything to say. I hate public speaking with all my heart. My heart will pound like crazy, my head will spin like I’m going to win a wheel of fortune, my throat will get dry…. anything that shouldn’t be happening will happen once I get in front of people, it doesn’t matter how many people too!

So yes, I might have the word of God in me, something I can share. However, it’s not time yet…. I don’t know if there will ever be time…. to preach…. just saying…. I’m still very much interested in studying theology.